Week 1: Self Awareness (Part 1)
This week is all about self-awareness and boy, did I learn a lot! I understand self-awareness as learning to better understand why you feel what you feel and why you behave in a particular way. Understanding this concept gives you the opportunity and freedom to change things about yourself enabling you to create a life that you want. One way we start is to begin to understand what is not working in your life or what you need to improve on. For me that was family time.
So guess what I decided to work on this week? Yes, you got that right...spend more time with my family. I am usually someone who is always on the go and although this week was indeed busy, it did not feel that way. I got to spend time with my family. Like meaningful time. We surprised my oldest by taking her and her sister to the park after school. My oldest and I also went out to lunch and had some mommy/daughter time. Her one request was that I take her to Chuck E Cheese after, so off we went! (I’ll probably not do that again anytime soon lol). We also got to decorate her Christmas stocking for school! One main thing that I realized this week is that although kids do love the stuff that you give them, most importantly, they value the time you spend with them. That undivided time and attention works wonders. I also got to think about my childhood and how moments I really remembered and enjoyed were the times I spent with my mom, brothers, and great aunt and uncle. I remembered the moments that impacted me the most. The moments that really mattered the most.
The takeaway: Spend more time with your family. Work will always be there. Give your kids the undivided time and attention that they need and crave. That does not have to be hours everyday, as long as it’s consistent and meaningful, that's what matters.
Being self aware also means that you know what makes you unique. One of the things which makes me unique is that I am able to impact others with my stories and to be able to create a safe space that allows others to feel comfortable opening up to me. This past weekend as a panelist at an amazing Black Maternal Health Summit, I was able to talk about part of my motherhood journey. I realized that I was where I needed and wanted to be. I felt like I was in my element. I was doing what I loved doing. What truly aligned to my values and beliefs. Two of the participants came up to me afterwards and expressed to me how moving my story was. It was such an amazing feeling to know what my story had an impact on the moms who attended. The Takeaway: Know your strengths and what makes you stand out. When your values align with what you do everyday then that’s when you know you’ve found your true passion.
The final experience I had this week involved expressing my emotions and feelings about something which I was hesitant about speaking about. It was an issue I knew I had to discuss with my significant other and the main reason why it was so difficult for me is because looking back I knew I was in the wrong...at least my attitude at the time was wrong. Let’s just say I can get quite passionate about certain things I feel strongly about especially when I care deeply. However, the way I come across sometimes can appear to be pushy or bossy. Maybe because I was the oldest? Maybe because I grew up learning how to take charge and be proactive? Maybe because I have often held supervisory roles? Who knows? But this is something I struggle with and I’m actively working on. The cool thing is that my husband knows this about me and is quite patient when I do go into that mode. Long story short...I had to suck it up and apologize to him for acting the way I did. I expressed to him why I felt so strongly and we discussed the best way of approaching it the next time.
The takeaway: Relationships require humility, owning up to your mistakes, admitting when you’re wrong even when you don’t want to. It is also important that you know your weaknesses and you are upfront about them so you can both help each other learn and grow.
